November 3, 2026
Medically Reviewed by: Dr. Guia Marie Canonizado , Medical Doctor & Nurse, Medical Content Specialist

Reviewed by Mel Samuels, BSocSci Psychology, Managing Director, Liberty Home Rehab. Reviewed: 3 November 2026.

When someone you love is struggling with addiction or mental health difficulties, your attention naturally goes to them. Over time, your own needs can slip quietly into the background. Many family members and carers experience stress, worry, sleeplessness and exhaustion. Looking after yourself is not selfish. It helps you stay well and makes it easier to support the person you care about.

This guide offers practical self-care for family members and carers: why it matters, simple daily steps and where to find support for yourself. You may also find our article on supporting someone with addiction and mental health issues helpful.

Key takeaways

  • Self-care for family members is not selfish: it helps you stay well and offer steadier support.
  • Carers commonly experience worry, poor sleep, isolation, guilt and anger.
  • Small, regular steps such as breaks, connection and boundaries make the biggest difference.
  • You cannot control another person’s recovery, but you can look after yourself.

The impact on families and carers

Research on families affected by addiction describes significant strain on relatives, including anxiety, low mood, financial pressure and strained relationships. NICE guidance on alcohol-use disorders recommends that families and carers are offered information and support, including an assessment of their own needs, in their own right.

You may notice:

  • Constant worry or feeling on edge.
  • Difficulty sleeping or concentrating.
  • Feeling isolated or ashamed.
  • Anger, guilt or grief, sometimes all at once.
  • Neglecting your own health, friendships or interests.

These reactions are common and understandable.

Why self-care matters

Caring for someone over a long period can lead to burnout. When you are exhausted, it becomes harder to stay calm, keep boundaries and make clear decisions. Looking after yourself helps you:

  • Stay physically and emotionally healthy.
  • Respond to difficult situations more steadily.
  • Model healthy coping for others in the family.
  • Keep a sense of your own identity beyond the caring role.

Practical self-care steps

Self-care for family members does not need to be elaborate. Small, regular steps often make the biggest difference.

Protect the basics

Try to keep regular sleep, eat well and stay active. These can be the first things to go when you are under pressure.

Stay connected

Keep in touch with friends and family who support you. Isolation can make everything feel heavier.

Take breaks

Time away from caring, even short periods, helps you recharge. The NHS highlights the importance of carers taking breaks and seeking respite where possible.

Set boundaries

Be clear about what you can and cannot do. Boundaries protect your wellbeing and can support your loved one’s recovery too.

Make time for yourself

Family support group meeting for self-care for family members of people with addiction

Hobbies, time outdoors, exercise or quiet moments can help restore balance.

Getting support for yourself

You do not have to manage alone. Support can include:

  • Family support groups, where you can share experiences with others in similar situations.
  • Counselling, to help you process your own feelings.
  • Talking to your GP or doctor if stress is affecting your health.
  • Speaking to a treatment provider about how families can be involved in a loved one’s care.

Letting go of what you cannot control

One of the hardest parts of caring is accepting that you cannot control another person’s choices. You can offer love, support and clear boundaries, but recovery ultimately belongs to the person themselves. Letting go of responsibility for their decisions can bring a sense of relief.

Self-care for family members: a weekly plan

Self-care for family members is easier to keep up when it is planned, rather than left for when you have spare time. A simple weekly plan can help you protect a little time for yourself, even in a busy or stressful period.

  • Daily: one small thing that is just for you, such as a short walk, a cup of tea outside or ten minutes of reading.
  • Twice a week: contact with a friend or relative who supports you, by phone or in person.
  • Weekly: a family support group, counselling session or activity you enjoy.
  • Monthly: a longer break from caring, even if it is only an afternoon.

If you notice that you are always putting your plan aside, treat that as a sign to ask for help, not as a personal failure. Other relatives, friends or support organisations may be able to share some of the load. In South Africa, the South African Depression and Anxiety Group (SADAG) offers information and support for people affected by mental health and substance use difficulties.

Families can also be involved in a loved one’s treatment. Our page on family therapy for addiction explains how family sessions can help everyone, not just the person in treatment.

How Liberty Home Rehab can help

Liberty Home Rehab is a private addiction and mental health rehab in Cape Town for adults aged 18 and over. Our team includes psychiatrist Dr Imraan Tayob, medical doctors, social workers and lived-experience professionals, and we recognise how much families carry.

We offer programmes of 28, 42, 56, 70 or 84 days across three phases, with secondary care at Liberty Home Rehab Manor and tertiary step-down care at Liberty Home Rehab Lodge. When a loved one is in treatment, families often find they finally have space to rest and focus on their own wellbeing.

Liberty Home Rehab offers residential treatment in Cape Town. Medically supervised detox happens on site, registered nurses are on site 24/7, doctors are on call 24/7, and admission can be immediate, subject to bed availability. If you are looking for rehab in Cape Town, our team will talk you through the options in confidence.

Frequently asked questions

Is it selfish to focus on myself while my loved one is struggling?

No. Looking after yourself helps you stay well and makes you better able to offer steady support.

What if I feel angry or resentful?

These feelings are common among carers. Talking them through with someone you trust or a counsellor can help.

Where can I find support as a family member?

Family support groups, counsellors and treatment providers can all offer guidance. Our team is happy to talk with families about options.

What does self-care for family members of an addict look like?

Protecting sleep, meals and exercise, keeping in touch with supportive people, taking regular breaks, setting boundaries and getting support for yourself.

Talk to us

If you are caring for someone with addiction or mental health difficulties and need guidance, contact Liberty Home Rehab on +27 60 014 4200.

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